CEM Corner: Essay Introduction & Conclusion
By Daryl Lee Spiewak, CEM, TEM, CFM, CEM® Commissioner and ASPEP President Emergency Action Coordinator, Brazos River Authority, Waco, TX
If you have been following these tips for the last four issues of the IAEM Bulletin, then you have a good idea of how to construct your emergency management essay. You learned how to develop your problem statement, construct the body of your essay, and write effective paragraphs. This month's tips article will discuss the most thought-provoking elements of your essay – the introductory and concluding paragraphs
The introductory paragraph makes your "first impression" by setting the tone for what is to follow. Use it to arouse interest, to introduce your subject and provide any necessary background information, to explain how you will treat the subject, and to divide your topic into the parts you will discuss within the body of your essay.
Make the introduction brief compared to the rest of the essay. Usually an introductory paragraph will contain four to six sentences and end with your thesis or problem statement. Sometimes it will take a couple of simple paragraphs to adequately introduce your topic and explain how you are going to discuss it. Just be sure not to make the opening too long or you will lose your reader's interest.
With some necessary background information and your problem statement, you have most of your introduction completed. The part that is missing is the very opening sentence. The English department of Purdue University offers some different ways to start the first sentence:
 Begin with a quotation that is relevant to your topic.
Begin with a question that you answer with your essay.
Begin with an acknowledgment of an opinion that is opposite to the one you plan to take.
Begin with a very short narrative or anecdote that has a direct bearing on your essay.
Begin with an interesting fact or finding.
Begin with a definition or explanation of terms relevant to your essay.
Begin with irony or paradox.
Begin with an analogy that is original and not too far-fetched.
Here are some final tips on writing your introductory paragraph. Make sure it is not stiff, too formal or impersonal. Remember your essay is taking the place of a personal interview. Do use strong verbs. Avoid the passive voice (past tense of the verb "to be"). Be direct and clear in your writing. Make it compelling so we will want to read the remainder of your essay.
Assuming you had your problem statement in view throughout your essay, your concluding paragraph should be easy. Provide a very brief summary of your main points and state a specific conclusion to end your essay.
The University of Richmond says to conclude an essay with one or more of the following:
Ask a provocative question.
Use a quotation that relates directly to the subject of your essay.
Evoke a vivid image.
Call for some sort of action.
End with a warning.
Compare with other situations.
Suggest results or consequences.
Here are some pitfalls to avoid:
Don't repeat your introduction or rephrase your problem statement. Refer back to the introductory paragraph with key words or parallel concepts and images.
Don't introduce a new topic or idea.
Don't apologize for your viewpoint.
Don't attempt to make up for incomplete body paragraphs. If you say you will discuss five items, don't completely cover three in the body and quickly summarize the other two in the conclusion.
Don't make claims that are not mentioned in earlier paragraphs.
The conclusion is the last thing the commissioners will read. Don't let your perfect essay fizzle out with a weak conclusion. Make a definite and strong concluding statement that ends your essay.
Now your first draft should be completed. Next month we will discuss editing tips to further refine your essay.
April 2001, IAEM Bulletin
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